“When we seek to discover the best in others, we somehow bring out the
best in ourselves.”
-William Arthur Ward
Over the
past few weeks, I’ve been working hard to intentionally help the students at
the rec. center to become stronger readers. I’ve made individual plans for each
of them, and have been tracking their progress so as to better help me evaluate
how I can help them best. We’re still in the beginning stages, and so it’s
often a struggle with some of them. Most are still learning to read, which, in
case you’ve forgotten over the years, is extremely hard and frustrating when
you’re just beginning.
We’ve
been coming every week since the start of the school year, and so my heart has
grown quite attached to each kid. I wholeheartedly want the best for each of
them. Playing games with them and listening to their stories brings me so much
joy. Laughing a dancing with them are always highlights. I want to be a part of
their happiness, but because I care about them, I also want to be a part of
their struggle. I want to enter into their process and fight to overcome, even
when they don’t want to.
However,
part of wanting the best for someone, especially when they are fighting against
it, is seeking to discover the best in them that already exists. Too often I
find, even myself, falling into this mindset of service and superiority. I’m trying
to help them. I’m doing them a service. They are lucky that I care. There’s a
problem with that. I’m starting them out at a loss, and trying to give them
more. It fails to acknowledge all the value and beauty that is already there. One
must seek to discover the beauty that already exist in every person. And we must
start with that beauty. Our approach much change to, “I see this beauty in you,
and I desire to see it blossom in you even more.” “I love this beauty that I
see in you, but I also see who you are becoming, and I love that too.”
The crazy
thing about this approach, is that it changes us, too; and brings out the best
in ourselves as well. It starts by humbling us. No longer am I helping out of
service, but out of genuine love. This mindset also offers grace in our own
lives. It allows us to view ourselves in a new light. We can take our flaws and
not be overwhelmed by them, but rather see them in light of who we are, and
who, by God’s grace, He is continuing to make us into.
These children
have and continue to be such a blessing to me. They continue to teach and grow
me in such beautiful ways. But what about you? Who are the people God has put
in your life? How are you approaching your relationship and fellowship with
them? Are you seeking to see the best in others? We are all flawed people who
need a lot of work. There will be always be aspects in others that you wish
would change, but how are you approaching that? Are you simply leaving it at
just what they need and how they should change? Or are you also seeking to
discover the beauty that already resides in them? I have given my students more
grace since they are so young, but it is teaching me lessons that I need to
extend to others. It’s humbling me in ways that challenge how I view others, and
my need of His great grace in my heart. It’s showing the ugly in my heart, and
my need to listen when Paul writes in Philippians 2:3 “Do nothing from selfish
ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than
yourselves.”
